Keep It Simple

It’s a simple slogan. I can see it. I can say it. I literally drink from a mug that exclaims it each morning but it is really hard for me to live it.

I thrive in chaos. Chaos was my world for 25 years as a drinking alcoholic – the drama, the madness, the confusion – that’s where I comfortably live because external chaos is comforting and familiar. Internal simplicity and possibility of being alone with my thoughts is terrifying.

While sober I still create chaos. This week I ended a relationship. Days later I adopted a street dog from Istanbul and prepared for a fight with anyone who didn’t fully support my choices to rescue a puppy… Completely avoiding the actual real human emotions of my situation.

Even with the best of intentions, I create chaos.

That is why I need a new way of living and my twelve-step program offers me that. In its simplest terms, it is about getting out of self and learning to trust a Power greater than me. That’s it — it’s just that simple.

When I trust in self, life is chaos.

When I trust in the Universe, life is exactly what it needs to be.

I have spent my entire life living in chaos and I don’t want to do it anymore. I am physically, mentally, spiritually exhausted which makes me [finally] ready to try something else. I’m ready to Keep It Simple in 2021.